Once upon a time…
Once upon a time their was a young girl (around the age of ohh 3-6) whose mother asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up. She gave the standard answers of a teacher,nurse or ballerina,because after all isn’t that what all girls of that age want to be? (cough cough….sterotype…cough)
Well that young girl’s mom told her what a wonderful teacher or nurse she would be, but might want to rethink the whole ballerina thing, because well ballerina’s had to be graceful. the young girl’s mother suggested maybe her daughter should become a soap actress because she was SO dramatic.(cough cough …. moi?….cough cough)
Well that young girl grew up and wanted to take dance. Did she take ballet?No she settled for jazz,which she was quite good at and loved until well that young girl broke both her feet in that horrible roof accident.
Then the young girl grew up even more and became a mommy who was pregnant for 5 years in a row. Numerous times this young girl fell down stairs spilling coffee everywhere, and was even talented enough one pregnancy to slide down the stairs and land into one of her kid’s Easter Baskets.
A few years after that the young girl (who ok really was ascending into middle age woman) was chasing after her youngest toddler. She had stood up from sitting and didn’t realize her foot had fallen asleep. This graceful woman managed to trip over the threshold of the entry way and slide across the entire width of the tile on her left side, just stopping short of hitting her head on the support beam. This talent led to a dislocated shoulder and many bruises up and down her whole body.
Well last night the middle aged woman decided that her mother had been right to detour her dreams of becoming a ballerina at such a young age. As if to prove her lack of grace to a full household she decided it would be fun to get her foot tangled in a blanket hanging up in the basement, and fall face first. Not only bruising up her knees and yes that pesky left shoulder again,even her collarbone, and being talented enough to land her face right into the corner of the wall! All the kids in the room stopped and stared in amazement as the middle aged woman bit her tongue to keep from cursing.Finally,getting brave enough to look at her bruised knees,thank God no blood,she got up and limped upstairs.
This morning that middle aged woman is feeling her age. She has discovered not only did she bruise her cheek and eye bone but her jaw as well!!!.
Hmmm maybe that young girl should’ve wanted to be a stunt double!
(and on a sidenote:This post would’ve been so much funnier if I had the talents of ReadingandChickens with her graphic drawings but I guess with me ya’ll just have to use your imagination!)